Mac & Cheese

Kraft Mac & Cheese. Utter those three words in any daycare and you'll have kids running and knocking over each other looking for the bowl of yellow noodles. Little Emma will be on the floor bawling cuz there ain't any, and pretty soon they'll all be bawling and you won't shut them up till you start cooking. If you say "Mac & Cheese" in a day care you'd better be able to back it up.

Say the same three words in just about any restaurant and the the staff will look at you in disgust as if you just brought in a sack lunch and pulled out your own ham sandwich. The social stigma associated with the little blue box is so great that if a friend comes over and finds one in your house you quickly say "oh, that's for the kids. I buy it for them." Or if you don't have any kids you hide the box waaay in the back of the pantry, up on the top shelf where nobody will know it's there except you.

The truth is: You like love the blue box, even though the thought that something resembling cheese can come from a tear-open paper packet horrifies you. And you have to work hard to suppress those feelings of guilt and shame as you open the box and cook the pasta. "I am a better cook than this" you think to yourself, over and over again, "I just don't have any time and I am hungry now." "I won't do this to you again," you promise your very expensive All-Clad pan.

But it's a promise bound to be broken. You can't walk by those blue boxes in the grocery store without pulling one down (or two or three or four--"They're on sale for $0.69, I'm saving money," you tell yourself as you hide the boxes underneath the organic tomatoes and fat free yogurt and the latest issue of Healthy Living).

When it comes to Kraft Macaroni & Cheese, there is a code of silence. All adults know this. But every once in a while somebody breaks the code.

"I like Kraft Mac & Cheese."

But instead of condemnation, we all feel relieved that somebody had the guts to say something we ourselves can't say. "I do too!" each of us say in turn. Such a big weight is lifted that we could almost join in a group hug and fall to the floor sobbing in each others arms. OK, maybe not. But it feels good to be able to say "I like Kraft Mac & Cheese" without fear of ridicule.

For those who don't have the courage to buy the blue box, I offer the following recipe. It's a grown-up version of Kraft Mac & Cheese using a French béchamel sauce.

No-Shame Mac & Cheese
Serves 6 as a main course, 10 as a side dish.

For the béchamel
4 Tbsp butter
1 1/2 cups all purpose flour
4 cups milk
1/2 tsp salt
pepper to taste

For the Macaroni & Cheese
1 lb Elbow macaroni
1/4 tsp Cayenne pepper (optional)
pinch grated nutmet (optional)
1/2 lb. Monterey Jack cheese, grated
1/2 lb. Sharp Cheddar, grated
1 tsp. salt
breadcrumbs (optional, for topping)

Bring a pot of water to boil. Add a tablespoon of salt and boil the pasta as you prepare the sauce. Follow the pasta package directions. Drain well and set aside.

Make the Béchamel
Melt the butter in a sauce pan over medium heat, whisk in the flour. Continue to cook and whisk until the sauce turns blonde, but don't let it brown. Add the milk and keep whisking while you bring the sauce to a full boil. Add the salt and pepper and reduce to a simmer and cook for 10 minutes, stirring occasionally to prevent scalding. The sauce will thicken.

When the sauce is done, take off heat and add the cheeses and the salt. Stir until the cheese is completely melted and combined. Add the pasta, cayenne and nutmeg, mix well and pour into a 13 x 9 baking dish. If you want a breadcrumb topping, sprinkle the breadcrumbs on top and place under a broiler until the breadcrumbs are browned.